Mid May

SACC is winding down. 7 weeks left to go. Hard to believe that another year is over already. Upon reflection I can honestly say that if I can do this year, I can do any year.

The problems at my centre are also my fault. My children's behaviour are a direct reflection of my lack of program planning. That will be on the top of my to do better list next year.

Now that I am confident that I have once again been passed over for a management position I can somewhat relax and focus on the here and now. Despite my lack of entrance into the management world, I have accomplished quite a bit this past 6 months.

I have completed and certified as a personal fitness trainer. My hours on the fitness floor are only going to increase with great expectations by my coordinator.

I am on the cusp of being certified as a group fitness trainer and will then be honored a class to teach every Thursday at 11-12pm. I am really looking forward to that.

Since Justin moved back home in December, we have come a great way together. I now not only love him, but also like him these days. He is becoming more and more like his father everyday... he should only be so fortunate.

Kate and I are also growing in our relationship. Every now and then I get a glimpse of an expression or a phrase and I see the woman inside of her waiting for her moment. It fills my heart to know that at this moment she can be all the things that I dream for her.

Robbie and I are coasting. We don't take time out to love each other every night like we used to but I know the love is still there, hiding between the yawns and sleepy eyes. I'm not sure what our relationship needs, but we do need something... A vacation? A romantic weekend? At this moment I'd take 4 hours alone at home. With this household, that will never happen. We used to rationalise a $200.00 weekend away for the sake of romance. These days it seems that the more I make the less we do.

Krissy talks even less these days. When we ask her questions about her life, we are shut out or given the shortest answer possible. I just hope she knows how much I do care about her and her monumental daily events. She is so much more than she see's possible. It is her that I am most proud of right now for her strength and determination.

Keri will always be fine. Whether I am in her life or not. As long as when I am, I devote all efforts to Keri and her plan, life between us will always be good. One thing I am ever grateful to her for is her love and sisterhood to Catheryn. She will never know how much that means to me.

I look forward to my spring. To working less and gardening more. To spending more time with my children and finding my husband again. To wine and chimminea fires in my backyard. To entertaining friends.

The flowers in the backyard bloom in a welcome explosion of color and fragrance, the time is now.. exhale.